Money, paperwork and the match

Remember that great news I heard from our agency this week? About the fact that all our paperwork was in and that we were mere weeks from becoming a waiting family? Well it sent me into a tailspin of panic about our finances.

It's tacky to talk money, but I think it will be helpful for you to understand how much adoption costs - there are so many little unknown fees here and there! Here is what it is going to cost us:
$1500 - Home study
$195 - Application Fee
$ 208 - Criminal clearances for County, State, Federal, plus postage
$1000 Activation Fee (will be turned in once our profile is complete/approved)
$20,000 - Adoption Match Budget (legal fees, advertising costs to agency, birth mother needs)
$600 - Post Placement Fees
$500- 3000- Travel/Lodging at birth - we are not allowed to leave the state with our child until both states have cleared us. This means we could be living in a hotel for 2 weeks!
Grand Total = $23,500 - $26,00 depending on travel/lodging costs

To date, we have received many generous donations from friends and family - about $3050! We have already used $1900 of it for the home study, application fee and our criminal clearances. We also bought a crib with part of the money, as that is what was suggested with the donation and we wanted to honor that family's request. So that leaves us with about $1000 for the activation fee.

The rest of the amount - over $20,000 - will be supplemented by a few things. We plan to borrow $10,000 from my retirement plan (they don't charge early withdrawal fees and you pay yourself back through your own paycheck pre-tax) , but that leaves us with over $10,000 to come up with and fast because we are required to pay the full $20,000 AT MATCH!!!

Here was my thought process - What if we get matched sooner than later? And what if we don't have the money? I sat on our couch last night in tears, asking my husband what we could do to make up the difference. We both work full time and are saving like crazy, we can't get extra jobs! We planned on doing a yard sale, but know that it could only net us so much. Our dear friends are doing a jewelry sale later this month, but who knows how much that will bring in? We have little equity in our home so can't borrow against it, our cars are not worth selling to get a cheaper model (they are both used and not much value in Blue Book standards). We are going to apply for grants but it seems we make a little too much to qualify, but not enough to pay for this on our own. Needless to say, I felt desperate, hopeless and sad. Here we had come all this way and it seemed that while generosity had poured in, there was still a huge gap and we could do little about it.

I think God has a great sense of humor. I went to bed that night, teary-eyed and just laid my worry at His feet, not fully trusting that He'd take care of us. The next afternoon after work, Matt and I were getting dinner together, when a couple we know and love pulled up in our driveway unexpectedly. We were happy to see them and they were just swinging by before they went to dinner. They sat down and we caught up for a few minutes. Then they asked us point blank about our finances. (Don't be shocked - we get lots of questions about this, and we answer them honestly.) We told them about having around 1/2 of what we needed for the match budget, plus needing money for travel, but we were saving, looking into grants, saving etc. They smiled at us, and quietly said, "Well, we'd like to offer you some help. We plan to give you $5,000 towards your budget."

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, that is THREE ZEROS BEHIND THAT FIVE. You read it right - FIVE THOUSAND DOLLARS!!!

I then proceeded to yelp with joy and burst into tears / start ugly crying into my hands. Matt started weeping as well and the poor couple just sat there in shock at our reaction (but seriously folks, how else did they expect us to react? With a genial thank you and a slightly limp handshake or hug?!?!). Once I was able to get my tears under control, I hugged them both tightly and told them about my sheer panic the night before, relaying how utterly helpless and hopeless I felt about our finances. They started to laugh and told us that they had planned on doing this for quite some time, but felt that tonight was the right time to tell us. Like I said, God has a sense of humor.

So now we're 3/4 of the way there on our match budget and $5,000 feels a lot less daunting to save/find/raise. We have a yard sale planned for the weekend of the 18th and my darling friends are hosting "Beads for Baby M" on the 25th - a fundraiser where 100% of their sales will go towards our adoption. Lord please bless this couple seven-fold of how they have blessed us. And bless my darling friends who are planning this fundraiser for us!

Sometimes I don't think this story, this story of how our sweet Baby M came to us, will get any better. And then it does.