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So my supply has dropped again. I was hopeful after taking Reglan and More Milk Plus and seeing great results. It seemed to be going so well, but then in the matter of a few days it was cut in half.
Brighton has become more and more active and more and more distracted. Her constant need to see the world around her and play, combined with still having to pump 3 times a day when I'm in the office definitely affected my supply. I started to supplement with formula once a day on the days I'm in the office, but my freezer stash is dwindling and I am pumping less and less.
So I'm on the fence about what to do...
- Do I keep going? Meaning nurse her every time she normally eats when I'm with her and keep pumping at all the nursing times when I'm away from her at work (3 times a day plus once a night before bed)?
- Do I just nurse her in for the first morning meal and in the evening before bed and do formula for all the other meals?
- Or do I just start the process of weaning her and be done with breastfeeding altogether?
So I plan to talk to her pediatrician this week and get her opinion on what to do, but I'd like some different perspectives as well.
So for you mama's who switched from nursing to formula, how did you do it? Were you able to keep some nursing sessions without having your supply totally drop off? How hard was it to switch to formula for most or all of your baby's meals? Did you have any physical or emotional side effects after you scaled back or quit? (If you don't feel comfortable leaving comments about your experience, please feel free to email me at matt and kara adopt [at] gmail [com].)
Thank you in advance for your opinions and help. This online community is amazing!
I'll definitely have to follow this post to see what others have to say about this. My supply is still good; I'm SAHM so that does help, however; like your daughter, my son is so distracted! It can be hard at times to nurse him. He doesn't seem to get full eating mode in every time because he wants to look around, sit up, smack at me, or laugh. It's cute, but gosh. My son is about your daughter's age (7 months).
ReplyDeleteDO keep us posted as what your doctor has to say about this.
Please continue this series! I am going through the same issue now with my 5 month old. When I am home, he nurses and I pump 3 times while at work. He typically takes 2 bottles while I am gone at work, however, I am usually only able to pump enough for 1 bottle and my freezer stash dwindled about a month ago. We have been supplementing with formula since then. Last week, he got very sick (double ear & respiratory infection) and refused to nurse - only taking a bottle. This caused my supply to drop and now, when he nurses, it will only satisfy him for about 2-3 hours (he used to go 4-5hrs between feedings). In order to get some sleep, we have been giving him 2oz of formula (or breastmilk if I have enough extra) in a bottle after nursing. On the positive side, he has had no issue switching between formula and breastmilk.
ReplyDeleteI have had the same weight struggles with our little guy that you had with Brighton - he is only in the 5th percentile for his weight. The doctors have been concerned about this and are constantly having his come in to check his weight.
I know that the stress I am putting on myself to pump more because of the doctors concerns only negatively affects my pumping but its so hard not to worry. I am having the same internal debate as to whether or not to continue breastfeeding and if I do, in what capacity (full/part time, etc).
Please continue to post about this...I would love to hear what you decide to do.
Weaning my son was the most emotional thing I went through with him. My supply concerns were similar to yours, I was taking the pills, drinking the tea, and still watching it go down. On top of that, my busy 6 month old began rejecting nursing. Even in the quiet evening and early morning. He simply felt that he was just done. It was more than a strike, he just really didn't want it anymore, and it broke my heart. I came to terms with it all, and realized that it had nothing to do with his feelings towards me, he was just growing and changing. And I quickly realized that formula was not the enemy. As moms (working, SAHM, part time), we all do the very best that we can for our children, and that has so many different definitions. I slowly began subbing formula bottles for breastmilk, reserving BM mostly for bedtime. Eventually, when the supply was gone, we were all formula and had no issues. Again, there is no right answer of what to do here, and it will most likely be very emotional for you. But you just make the best choice that you can for you and your family, and keep focused on that beautiful little girl! Oh, and I had no physical issues stopping since my supply was so low anyways. Good luck!
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely continue this series! Its so helpful to get your perspective for moms like myself. I stay at home and my daughter is 6 months old but she, too, is starting to get distracted - nursing only 5 minutes on ONE side every session - that's all! We have her 6 month appointment coming up and I have to talk to her ped (who is also my lactation consultant, how convenient!) to see what she thinks.
ReplyDeleteObviously it all depends on if shes gaining weight and growing at a proper rate. Its not easy, but if Brighton continues to stay in the lowest percentiles for weight maybe it would be best to switch and only nurse at morning at night. You said before that her growth didn't concern her pediatrician so if thats still the case you really should just follow your heart.
I have to admit nursing has been one of my favorite parts of having a wee one. I will miss it so!
My advise... follow your heart and pray for what is the best choice for YOU and your lovely daughter... I think all choices have pros and cons.
ReplyDeleteI pumped 3 times at work and once before bed for a year and it was TERRIBLE. We are expecting our second in early September and one of things I am most concerned about is Breastfeeding and pumping... it was such an emotional roller coaster for me. When Sofie turned one we went to nursing at morning and at night. I also transitioned her to whole milk for day time feedings. For three months we did the morning and night nursing and I LOVED it. Being a working mom I loved those snuggles in the wee hours and at bedtime. Around 15 months she just stopped being interested... it was very uneventful we just slowly stopped. I still miss it sometimes but I also really like the freedom. This morning I went to the gym and my husband took her to the babysitter. I love reading this series and hearing everyone's thoughts and stories.
For me... I felt that I HAD to breastfeed and I was a bad mom if I didn't, in retrospect I wish I had not put that pressure on myself. I felt like other moms were judging me because I had to supplement with formula because of my supply issues and my daughter's slow weight gain.
We SUPPORT you no matter what! You are an amazing mom.
For me the hardest part was thinking about it. I wanted to cry too, and I felt so overwhelmed with guilt. But after I actually did it, it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought. She was fine and I was so relieved. The THINKING about it was so much worse than going through with it. My husband and I both agreed it was a great decision, because a stressed mom is less beneficial overall than a non-breastfeeding yet peaceful and relaxed mom. I believe that sometimes our current society pushes breastfeeding a little too hard. Yes, it is a wonderful thing and should be advocated for- but one should not feel like formula is evil or that it will negatively affect their child. I always say do what would give you peace and what isn't motivated by fear and/or guilt. You are doing great!
ReplyDeletePS I wrote a post about my experiences with this same dilemma here in case you want to read it: http://www.lisaelaine4.blogspot.com/2013/01/thoughts-on-best-nutrition.html
ReplyDeletei had a somewhat similar experience to you with my 2nd baby. At around 5 or 6 months my supply dropped A LOT and my baby went way down on growth charts, she started eating solids and seemed healthy in every other way so i didn't worry too much about it, but then at about 8 months i developed thrush, which was HORRIBLE! i had to make the decision on whether to try and get through the Thrush or just start weaning her, it was a very emotional decision. I started supplementing formula while still trying to breastfeed, and eventually my thrush cleared up. At about 11 months she was completely weaned and had started packing on a lot more weight. (which sort of added to my guilt of not being able to breastfeed). But in the end it was very freeing for me, my breastfeeding struggles from 8-11 months ended and i knew my baby was getting what she needed and thats what comforted me. She is now 18 months and the healthiest and happiest baby (toddler). I feel that in the push to get more women to breastfeed (which is really good) we have also alienated those who can't, have troubles or who have a baby who self weans, just remember that although "breast is best" doesn't mean "formula is worst". Formula is best in situations where "breast doesn't work" (i hope that makes sense). I've been reading all of your "adventures in breastfeeding" post and i think Brighton is very luck to have a mommy who is so committed to her and her health, you've really done an amazing job!!
ReplyDeleteI'm a SAHM but have really struggled with low supply from the beginning and had to start supplementing at 3 weeks. :( My goal after that was to make it to 6 months partially breastfeeding. He is now 7 months and I have been pleasantly surprised to find that we've been able to continue. I do pump in the morning and at night, take herbs, and offer him a nursing a few times a day with his bottles of formula. During the day, sometimes he will nurse, often he won't (but he's always willing in the middle of the night or first thing in the morning), so I am thinking about transitioning to just night and morning too. Anyway, all this is just to say that, at least in my experience, it doesn't COMPLETELY disappear as drastically as you might expect even when you scale back, and I really like the convenience/bonding of being able to just nurse him in the middle of the night or when he needs the comfort, so now I'm hoping to continue that until at least 1 year. Best of luck on your decision and just remember that you're a rock star mom either way. Breastfeeding is TOUGH!
ReplyDeleteI ended up quitting almost cold turkey. My husband and son had to be in Canada for a week without me, and even though I'd successfully nursed and pumped for 7 months while working full time, having my son away that week seemed to make my body think he wasn't around anymore and my supply literally just stopped. Made my decision pretty easy in a way. Emotionally I was a little sad for a few weeks, but then once the girls started to shrink and I went and bought some beautiful new, non nursing bras, I felt like a whole new woman and didn't regret it one bit! Thankfully my son who was 9 months made the transition easily as well. Took formula like a pro, and he even stayed quite healthy despite losing the benefits of my breastmilk. To each woman her own experience, but if you have to quit nursing due to supply (and of course other factors), I promise you that you will get over the little emotional hump and begin to feel like a new woman as well :-)
ReplyDeleteDon't quit this series! It is so encouraging to hear real stories of success, struggle and uncertainties. I love hearing your thoughts and gaining wisdom and insight on mothering topics like breastfeeding. My little girl is only 3 months, so I don't really have any advice. But I hope you find encouragement in all of these uplifting comments from other mamas who have gone through similar situations. You are such a caring mother, Kara. It is evident in the way you write about your love for Brighton and evident in your care for her. She is blessed to have a mama whose love reflects the agape love our Father has for us!
ReplyDeleteI accidentally wrote this under my husband's Google account. This is Mallory Kirk ; )
DeleteI figured it was you Mallory ;) Thank you!!!
DeleteWe switched to formula when Lucy was around 11.5 months old. She gradually weaned herself and I was pretty heartbroken. First she did the distracted and nursing less and less thing, then she only wanted one boob (and YUP I had one huge one and one tiny one), THEN she stopped waking up at night all together....I had nothing left. After we started with formula she would occasionally see my boobs and make a move for them and it broke my heart that I didn't have anything for her anymore. Then when she was 13 months old or so we switched to organic whole milk. We just weaned her off the bottle at 18 months...we took advantage of the fact that she had a stomach virus and hasn't had a bottle in 5 days and we went cold turkey. Anyway Lucy became VERY attached to her bottle so I felt ok about her having that emotional connection with something else rather than being left high and dry but it was so hard to stop BFing! I was very emotional for a few days! Do what you feel is best for you guys and know that it will be ok! But also know that these struggles are normal and if you push through you could just have a different nursing schedule than you've had so far...maybe she just nurses two times a day or something, and yes it will be more for the emotional and cuddling aspects than the nutritional but that's ok!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much Ali! It's good to hear I am not alone in these struggles.
DeleteI could have written this exact same post a month ago! My little guy (9 months) no longer wanted to nurse, but I was determined to provide him with as much breast milk as possible, so I was pumping 6+ times a day... and barely getting enough for 2 bottles (and supplementing the rest with formula). Meanwhile, I was missing out on work and social time while pumping and my supply continued to drop. Finally, I just stopped pumping and it became clear my body was ready to be done too. I was not uncomfortable or engorged and I only pumped 1x 3 days after stopping for a little relief. It was a little emotional, but I look back at our breastfeeding time as a positive one. I'm so glad I was able to provide for 9 months, but moving to formula was the right move, at the right time for our family.
ReplyDeleteThat is tough! I'd say just see how it keeps going...maybe she is starting to show you signs she is ready to ween and let her guide you. When I stopped nursing my son I was so sad. We had to for medical reasons. Good luck, though! You;'ll figure it out.
ReplyDeleteDo not have a wee one to feed yet so, I do not know but, what I do know is HOW CUTE B LOOKS IN THAT PHOTO! O MANNNNN!!! sheskillingme!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for sharing your struggles Kara! We need more honest momma's like you out there!
ReplyDeleteI stopped pumping around 9 months, as my supply was so low, and felt super guilty. My mom reminded me that even before formula existed, mothers weren't expected to feed their baby 100%. They had wet nurses, or sisters, or friends with more milk, to help out. In case they didn't, many children would die.
We have to stop with the unrealistic expectations of "natural" mothering, that never existed in the first place! For all I know, my Mom was the quintessential "mother", large bosom, super fertile, had 7 healthy children and drug-free births... Yet she only nursed each baby for about 3 months.
Nursing was always difficult for her, so after a few months of passing on her antibodies through her milk, she would rather have us heartily swallow a bottle than half-suckle on her breast.
Common sense, she says, and I have to agree. Even if I selfishly miss nursing...
I love your mom's perspective. It's true and I think we independent folk forget that we can't do it all on our own.
DeleteMy supply dropped when I went back to work, and though I tried to keep pumping and nursing when I was with my daughter, I just couldn't keep up. I eventually went to formula during the day and nursing in the morning and before bed. It made the transition easier for me, and I weaned her within a month to six weeks. No regrets on that!
ReplyDeleteMy son is also a busy body. Around 8-9 months he was so, so difficult to nurse and my supply took a hit and I sometimes wondered why I should bother. I persevered, because I am stubborn and knew that for our family the benefits of nursing for him and I outweighed my angst, my supply issue and his distractibility.
ReplyDeleteFor my son, continuing to nurse (he still nurses 2-4x/day @ 13mo) has been vital as he has milk and soy intolerances that are quite severe. It was/is helpful on his distracted days to take him to a quiet room, nurse him while talking or singing to him to keep him focused on me and remind him to have 'gentle hands' while he explores my shirt/face/hair/earrings.
Obviously, your situation is different and you (and Matt!) need to decide what is going to be the best solution for your family and work situation. Good luck!
You need to do what's best for you. It sounds like this is something you want to continue so maybe nursing twice a day is what's best for you. Don't feel guilty for whatever you decide, you've made it almost 8 months and that is a HUGE accomplishment, there's nothing wrong with whatever you decide.
ReplyDeleteBTW I LOVE Brighton's dress, I have the same one for my daughter!
Don't you love Target? I keep finding the cutest, most affordable dresses there.
DeleteThank you for the encouragement. Mom guilt is the worst kind of guilt.
Definitely don't quit before you're ready to emotionally. Also, that crazy nursing stage they go through does end.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like trying to keep your supply up as her main source of nutrition is quite stressful, so perhaps just keep nursing when you're with her, when she wants it, and see where the road takes you. In my experience, breastfeeding an older child (above 1 year or so) is really, really just as sweet. I loved those early morning cuddles with my 18 month olds, or random weekend naptime nursings, etc.
Just saying, don't stress yourself out, you are working, but if you enjoy it emotionally, keep it up when you're with her. Maybe ditch the pumping.
Good luck. She is gorgeous, gorgeous, gorgeous and no matter what you choose to do, you have done a wonderful job and you love her. She knows that. You are enough.
You are so kind and I can't tell you how much your comment meant to me. Thank you so much Amy.
Deleteto me its pretty simple... some breastfeeding will always be better than none. enjoy those precious moments you both share while nursing, even if its only getting in a few cuddles at night.
ReplyDeleteI wrote an entire post about my losing battle with breastfeeding. I made it to exactly three months and havent nursed since. I think deep down in your heart you know what to do and you shouldnt feel guilty but proud that you made it so long. But I know how the guilt trip goes and its "easier said than done".
ReplyDeleteHi Kara. My daughter Caroline is 8 months today and we are still breastfeeding. I wanted to speak to the distractibility/slapping part that you are dealing with. Caroline was doing the same thing, arms flailing, scratching herself - so I gave her a lovey. Now while we nurse she hangs onto that, rubs it on her face, and plays with the tag. It's helped a lot. Good luck on your decision though. I feel blessed to have gone this long but I will be very happy to not pump anymore! :)
ReplyDeleteGood idea. I will try that!
DeleteI think the first step is asking yourself why stopping breastfeeding/pumping makes you want to cry. Are the tears because you don't want to give up the bonding (achieved through breastfeeding) between you and B and because you enjoy it? Or are the tears purely feelings of guilt? If the answer is because you enjoy it then maybe keep at it or keep the AM & PM feed and supplement the others. If the answer is totally out of self imposed mommy guilt then I'd say that is not a reason to continue. There will always be areas of motherhood that induce intense emotion and guilt. Also, if you are spending more time stressing about your supply then that might be another sign pointing to weaning. My view is this. . . you cannot make a bad or wrong decision here. Sure, while breast milk is "best," formula is in no way, shape or form "bad." So it is really a win win situation, no matter what you decide. Either way she will still be getting the nutrients she needs to thrive and grow. :)
ReplyDeleteI breastfed my daughter until 3.5 months and then, due to some issues, started pumping exclusively and giving her my milk via bottles. She is now 11 months old and I just weaned off the pump. Now I'm using up my freezer stash and supplementing with formula (our pediatrician said it was fine to mix breast milk with formula together, which is what I'm doing, like 3 oz of breast milk and 3 oz formula per bottle, so maybe you could also try that???) for the next month.
Good luck!! :) I appreciate your posting on this topic!
These are questions I thought of over the weekend and the guilt is because I don't want to give up the bonding. However, the stress of nursing her during the day is almost as intense.
DeleteI have mixed milk and formula before and it worked well. I still have a small freezer stash so I will definitely use that up.
Thank you for bringing your wisdom to this post! I am so thankful for your comment and questions!!!
Hi Kara,
ReplyDeleteBreastfeeding went great for the first four months. Although, my supply diminished greatly due to stress (My husband was diagnosed with stage 3 melanoma when Payton was 1 month old, had three surgeries and a trip to MD Anderson Cancer Center, then we had water damage and mold when we returned and couldnt stay at our house for a month). Yikes! I started out giving one bottle a day with formula, but she was like Brighton the rest of the time, distracted, hyper, etc. I didn't enjoy it anymore. I decided to use up my supply in the freezer and then switch to formula exclusively after that. There were no issues.
Becca I can imagine the stress all those situations caused, especially your husband. I hope that he is fully recovered and in remission!
DeleteI don't have any advice, as I currently nurse my 3-month old son and am going back to work in a few weeks when my maternity leave ends. I am planning on pumping at work and nursing when with him, but I'm getting super stressed out about all the logistics (supply drop, finding time to pump at work, how many ounces to send to daycare, etc.). I've really enjoyed reading this series and your experience has helped me a lot. Thank you for being so honest and open about this topic! Please keep us posted, and pray for peace in whatever decision you make.
ReplyDeleteTindra got four top teeth within a few days last week and decided during that she would NOT nurse. She will be one in a couple of weeks, but it was and still is a bit heart breaking. I was So incredibly bummed to have to switch to formula for just a few weeks, but luckily she does OK on it, but I can tell she definitely doesn't like it as much as breast milk- which having smelled it I can't really blame her! There is no right answer, you will figure out whats best for both of you!
ReplyDeleteWeaning is a very difficult decision. I dried up with my 1st at 10 months. I felt so guilty. I lasted until 15 months with my 2nd before deciding to wean. I was pregnant and it was very, very painful. Still felt incredibly guilty about it. Try not to beat yourself up about it, if you decide to wean. If you really want to continue breastfeeding, there are a lot of things you can do. Have you tried fenugreek or brewer's yeast? Both helped me a lot when I had supply issues with my first. Fenugreek was super effective for me and you can take quite a bit of it, so it usually helps almost everyone.
ReplyDeleteI didn't have good success with breastfeeding, so I don't know that I'm the best opinion to trust. :) BUT, it seems from what I've read from other blogs and from what I've heard from Mommas I've talked to, that the nurse in the morning and at night option is the one most of them drifted to. Then you still get to keep those snuggly, comforting times and just add in formula during the day. I don't know how that will affect your supply??? But maybe it'll be just what your body needs. Best of luck any way you go. Brighton is such a pretty girl. :)
ReplyDeleteKara, I never comment but I just had to on this one...I want to give you some encouragement. The same thing happened with me and my son when he was Brighton's age. I am happy to report that I continued to nurse him in the morning and before bed WITHOUT PUMPING in between for close to a year after I stopped pumping.
ReplyDeleteGood luck!
This is really good news to me as this is what I am leaning towards. Thank you so much for letting me know that it worked for you!
DeleteNever quit on a bad day. Many of your issues are very normal and cause many moms to quit regretfully.
ReplyDeleteI hope these can help:
http://kellymom.com/bf/pumpingmoms/pumping/pumping_decrease/
http://kellymom.com/parenting/parenting-faq/distractible-baby/
I attended a breastfeeding class (my baby boy is due next month!) and one woman works really long hours four days in a row and doesn't have access to pumping, but she wanted to do some breastfeeding. She is going to nurse in the morning and at night when she can and supplement with formula otherwise. That sounds like a good solution for some situations--you still get to bond, cuddle and nurse, and you aren't entirely using formula. I hope you figure out a great plan! I hope breastfeeding will work well for me, but I'm nervous since I too will be pumping at work when I go back. Thanks for this series, Kara. It has been so helpful since not many blogs I read have moms that work outside of the home!
ReplyDeleteAll -
ReplyDeleteThank you, thank you, thank you. All of these comments were so kind and I am grateful that you took the time to share your personal experiences with me and others. I read each comment multiple times this weekend and they helped solidify what decision I was leaning towards.
Y'all are the best!
Love,
Kara